The Bitch, Bitch, Bitch

Auntie K’s Wednesday (Thursday) Words of Wisdom: Ah, L’amour
April 22, 2010, 12:17 am
Filed under: Auntie K's Words of Wisdom Wednesdays

Today, childen, we’re going to read a nice little Hallmark book from1976. I beseech you to look past the sweater-wearing, mustachioed gentleman and his Fawcett-esque girlfriend to see the greater message. And while the original provider of this content seems to hint that the author is full of shit, (the comments express this more lividly), there are good things to be leeched from this.

EDIT: On second thought, it’s probably the smarmy, distant look in Mustachio’s face that gives the words a whininess they may not have been written with. So, a change of pace, children – we’re going to close our eyes and use our imaginations.

Please Don’t Promise Me forever.

I want us to love each other one day at a time

and string all those days together like the precious things they are

instead of trying to hard and promising too much.

Please don’t expect me

to always be kind and good and loving.

There are times where I will be cold

and thoughtless

and hard to understand.

But it will only be because of the weather

or the flu

or one of my moods…

…not because I love you less.

Please remember that.

Please don’t think about all the things

that could happen to us.

Don’t think about other people

coming between us.

Don’t think about outgrowing each other

or growing out of love.

Please do think about all the good things

that could happen to us.

Think of growing closer to each other,

finding new reasons to be together…

…and think of loving.

I will, too.

I am right now.

Please don’t get mad at me

if I forget your birthday

or some special day we share

and please remember

that there is an “everydayness”

about what we have

that is beyond birthdays

and anniversaries.

That’s why, sometimes,

I may not remember one special day…

because all our days are special to me.

Please don’t ever

sign a letter “as ever.”

Please don’t be too easy on me…

or expect me to be too easy on you.

Both of us have room to grow,

and both of us have to grow

if we want to hold each other’s love.

Please don’t ever give me

too much of yourself

or take too much of me.

In our togetherness

we still need our private places.

Please listen to me

when I’m talking to you…

…and please don’t ever think of someone else

when I kiss you.

Please don’t start an argument

Or make me look foolish in front of other people…

…but when we’re alone

don’t feel like you’re walking on eggs.

Go ahead and say what you think.

If I need telling off,

tell me off.

Then we can have our fight

and make up

and love again.

Just us.

Please remember

to call me sometimes

for no reason

except that you feel me thinking about you

needing your voice.

Please don’t ever lose

that laugh of yours –

it’s such a real laugh.

And never change the way

you brush my hair back from my eyes

and smile

when I’m trying to be very serious…

or the little odd ways you have

of saying things that make you “you”

one of a kind,

the one I love.

Please, let’s not use politeness

and busyness and silence

to avoid our problems

and the places where we hurt.

If something is wrong

let’s go after it and make it right.

It’s a good feeling,

to think of growing older with you

but, please,

let’s not ever grow old.

I want us to always hang on

to the newness

that we have right now.

And let’s never be ashamed

of our innocence,

of the child within us.

Let’s never give up our dreams.

Please don’t try to keep it from me

when you’re feeling down.

I’ll never be able to share in your joy

if you try to protect me

from your sadness.


don’t say never…

…and please

don’t promise me forever.

All I ask

is that you love me


And please know

that I love you more


Than I ever have before.

I can’t promise you forever,

but I can promise you today

with hope and belief

that there is a beautiful tomorrow

in store for us.

So! That was quite a doozy, hmm?

That I like this book/poem/rambling whinefest could be considered out of character – in ideal, discussin’ terms, I like to hold my romantic partners to decently high standards, the same ones to which I hold myself. Really, how you read this depends on personal experience and interpretation – it can be read as cute and hopeful, or self-centered and transient. Why do I choose the former?

It’s a good message, I think, and it’s all about seeing love in realistic terms.  Nobody can truly promise forever, we might step in front of a bus! Yet it rubs people the wrong way, because it appears to take all the idealism and romanticism out of love. It calls upon you to consider that things may not always be perfect, and your unhappiness is inevitable – something that, to me, predicts a much healthier relationship than living in a world of idealistic denial. While I don’t feel it is impossible to love forever (more on that next week!), doing so is a very serious commitment (one that, based on the current divorce rate, seems to be taken too lightly by a lot of overly-idealistic people who preferred to push doubt to the back of their minds in favor of not being alone). There are a couple things Anonymous Hallmark Author says here that reek of selfishness – asking to be excused for forgetting your partner’s birthday is taking it a little bit far, as is the general “don’t do this, don’t do that” tone – but I feel that the overall intention is good-natured. Perhaps my interpretation is skewed from reading this philosophy in my solitude instead of something my boyfriend handed me, since as far as I’m concerned, if you’re giving someone an unadulterated hallmark book/card as a romantic gift, you’re a major wet blanket. The fact that you can’t be assed to put out more effort than passing a $5 bill over the counter at CVS is a bigger red flag than anything this passage suggests, in my book.

But, I will leave you now to stew over this polyester-laden philosophy. Check in next Wednesday for Part II!

Also, if you’ll take a lookie-loo in the sidebar, I have a formspring, Ask Auntie K! Not just a source of unwarranted self-importance, this is a forum where you can ask questions anonymously. I will tackle your topic on my Wednesday Words of Wisdom, and we’ll all share a graham cracker. Toodles!


1 Comment so far
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Hey- guess who? Love your blog 🙂 keep it up. and for similar sentiments, try this:

Much love,


Comment by Dan

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